Radio Plays I Have Known

1977. First time I remember listening to a radio play, I was five or six. Sitting in the back corner of my aunt's house. I want to say it was Inner Sanctum, but it might have been Lights Out or more likely CBS Radio Mystery Theater. Some horror or thriller. The narrator described being inside the back of an ambulance. I wasn't an instant fan of radio plays, but this has stuck with me.

1988. Junior year of high school. Mr. Groesser's Creative Writing class. I think the assignment was to write a scene in some format we weren't used to, a screenplay or radio play. Julian and Jeff and I recorded a radio play making fun of Star Trek. We didn't consciously plagiarize Mad magazine, but we had read enough parodies of Star Trek that it came easy. Rapid fire jokes and puns in the style of Vaudeville or Airplane movies.

Captain Jerk: We're under attack. Boners, quick, go and shake that tv camera!

Boners: Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor not a camera man.
Captain Jerk: There are four hundred lives at stake! (Sound of baby crying.) Make that four hundred one.

We recorded it on a cassette tape and played it in class. Five or ten minutes long, probably. Mr. Groesser apologized to the class after playing it, saying he hadn't screened it ahead of time. He didn't really scold us for it though and I'm not sure which parts he felt were naughty. The captain saying "Dammit"? Spotty saying, "Bloody Hell?" A character named Boners? Oh crap, I just remembered the problematic name and accent we used for Spock. Maybe that was it.

2005. Melinda and I started dabbling in short audio skits, posted on various websites or forums. "Rainbow Brite interviews Pat Benatar." I don't remember where that idea came from but that was a good one. I recorded and posted The Radcliffe Project. "Audio commentary to second Harry Potter movie, in which the narrator (Robert Levi) describes the hidden messages planted by Chris Columbus, J.K. Rowling and Time Warner to prevent Mr. Levi from marrying the star of the film, Daniel Radcliffe."

February 28, 2006. My first podcast! Brazen Hearts, Fresh, On Sticks. "Josie is your typical young goblin, selling freshly grilled human hearts outside the mall, trying to survive her ruthless family, and pining after that dreamy hobgoblin who just stomped into town. Each week, uh, month? Year? Well, periodically she describes part of her story to you, another human whose heart she will soon be selling on a stick." Twelve chapters. How could I stop before hitting 13? I roped Melinda and some of my friends into recording parts for it. I still have tons of notes for a possible "season two."

January 7, 2007. I started the Dungeons and Dayjobs podcast, reading samples from my short story collection of the same name (still available in paperback or a free ebook on archive.org). Active through 2008, then a gap til 2012. Then in 2020, just before launching This Gun in My Hand, I posted a stand-alone story, The Liability of Keiko, about a villain calling out El Hornet Verde on all his bullcrap.