Why We Fight - Episode 38

Why is a gun-toting pulp hero fighting a colorful costumed superhero? Did Zachary Horace Mazzuchelli have a hand in their conflict? And why is it always Italians? Find out!

Why We Fight, episode 38 of This Gun in My Hand, was punched out by Rob Northrup. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, information on how to subscribe, and to buy my books, such as Little Heist in the Big Woods and Other Revisionist Atrocities. With what will I console myself after the fight is over? This Gun in My Hand!

This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog.

Show Notes:

1. J-Men Forever is a 1979 movie written by two members of Firesign Theatre.

2. It’s possible for one person to have one-third of a nationality or ethnicity, but you’d probably need to know detailed genealogy further than three or four generations back.

3. A pathological liar I knew in college claimed to have written songs that were recorded by Guns ‘n Roses, Tesla, Indigo Girls and Melissa Etheridge. This one’s for you, Jaime.

4. In episode 37, “Strikeforce Shakespeare,” Falk mentions that he was investigating a screeching sound in the area. I was thinking forward to the screechers in this episode.

5. Believe it or not, I used only my voice, no effects or trick editing to create The Screecher’s amazing screech.

Credits:

The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals.

Sound Effect Title: Punch.wav

By ztrees1

License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0

https://freesound.org/people/ztrees1/sounds/134934/

Sound Effect Title: Punch 1

License: Public Domain

https://freesound.org/people/peridactyloptrix/sounds/209765/

Whistle Sound Effect Title: Hey You.wav

By Benboncan

License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0

https://freesound.org/people/Benboncan/sounds/77752/

Sound Effect Title: barking dog 2

License: public domain

https://freesound.org/people/roman_cgr/sounds/415023/

Sound Effect Title: Skittering Dog

License: Public Domain

https://freesound.org/people/sittingmonkeyanim/sounds/199919/

Sound Effect Title (panting dog): chip.aiff

License: Public Domain

https://freesound.org/people/juan%20pablo%20escobar%20plaza/sounds/235813/

The image accompanying this episode is a modified panel from the public domain Our Flag Comics, No. 4, February 1942, page 14. Pencils and inks by Harry Anderson. Text in the word balloons by Rob Northrup. In the original comic book, the colorful character is The Flag and the other one is a generic bad guy.

Strikeforce Shakespeare - Episode 37

Who are these gun-toting mugs wearing tights & ruffled collars, herding citizens onto trucks? Can Falk Zildjian stop an army? Find out!

Strikeforce Shakespeare, episode 37 of This Gun in My Hand, was pacified urbanely by Rob Northrup. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, information on how to subscribe, and to buy my books, such as Little Heist in the Big Woods and Other Revisionist Atrocities. What light through yonder window breaks? It is the gleaming of This Gun in My Hand!

This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog.

Show Notes:
1. The seed idea for this episode was a character named Strategic Hamlet. Read more about how American armed forces have actually used it:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strategic_Hamlet_Program
2. To hear the earlier confrontation between Defenders of the Hearth and the World Crime Syndicate, listen to Episode 13, “OnlyPhantasm.” https://archive.org/details/tgimh-13-only-phantasm

Credits:
The opening and middle transitional music clips were from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals.

Sound Effect Title: 38 Caliber Gun Shot 5x
Recorded by Mike Koenig
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
http://soundbible.com/375-38-Caliber-Gun-Shot-5x.html

Sound Effect Title: Window breaking.MP3
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/m1a2t3z4/sounds/112213/

Sound Effect Title: Bulldog Howl
By GB01
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/GB01/sounds/174873/

Sound Effect Title: footsteps cellar.wav
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/gecop/sounds/545030/

Sound Effect Title: Noise
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/jhepkema/sounds/149445/

Machine gun sound taken from the public domain film Commandos (1968).

The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of “Hamlet” etched by Leopold Flameng after a statue by Lord Ronald Gower, published in the Art Journal, 1881, plus helmet detail from the comic book Warfront, No. 29 (July-September 1956), page 7, pencils and inks by Warren Kremer. Both source images in public domain.

D Is for Dirigible - Episode 36

Will spies make off with microfilm blueprints of the magnificent Airship Islington? Can Zildjian prevent a zeppelin attack on the aeroplane factory? What’s the Cockney rhyming slang for parachute? Find out!

D Is for Dirigible, episode 36 of This Gun in My Hand, was erected and inflated by Rob Northrup. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, information on how to subscribe, and to buy my books, such as Little Heist in the Big Woods and Other Revisionist Atrocities. Who wouldn't like to ride in my beautiful, my beautiful balloon? This Gun in My Hand! 

This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog.

Show Notes:
1. I’m not sure how often or in what era Brits used the phrase “old thing” as they might say “old boy” or “old chap.” Or did anyone really use the expression outside of Lord Peter Wimsey Mysteries (1970s BBC tv series)?

2. My job used to be acquiring periodicals for a company that reproduced them on microfilm. I love how every spy movie for a decade or two featured heroes and villains fighting over microfilm. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think the only people using it were spies.

3. The Islington’s passenger’s name is not intended to make you think of Mike Rowe, the tv villain and apologist for capitalism. I needed that part of the name to fit the pun. As always, “The audio and text of This Gun in My Hand are works of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places and events are products of the author's imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.”

4. “Cabbage root” is almost certainly not Cockney rhyming slang for “parachute.”

Credits:
The opening and middle transitional music clips were from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals.

Sound Effect Title: Punch.wav
By ztrees1
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/ztrees1/sounds/134934/

Sound Effect Title: Airship propeller engine
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/ilm0player/sounds/578181/

Sound Effect Title: R10-56-Footsteps on Metal Staircase.wav
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/480641/

Sound Effect Title: flak blast 2.wav
By Piotr123
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/Piotr123/sounds/551532/

Sound Effect Title: Fireworks - Whistle/Whine
By marklaukkanen
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/marklaukkanen/sounds/580751/

Sound Effect Title: explosion bomb
By Jurgerius
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/Jurgerius/sounds/473819/

Sound Effect Title: wind.wav
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/nelstayade/sounds/525292/

Music Title (start of fake ad): "Windy Winds - Intro A”
Jay Man - OurMusicBox
https://www.our-music-box.com/
https://www.youtube.com/c/ourmusicbox/
License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0

Sound Effect Title: Flock Seagulls
Recorded by Daniel Simion
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
http://soundbible.com/2193-Flock-Seagulls.html

Sound Effect Title: Lake Waves 1.wav
By Benboncan
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/s/67883/

The image accompanying this episode is a modified version of a drawing from The Illustrated London News, April 11, 1936 (Public Domain).

Crypt O' Knight - Episode 35

Will Falk Zildjian escape from the hoard of crypto vermin? Would you gladly pay me one ten-thousandth of a Ditcoin Tuesday for a hamburger today? Listen to find out!

Crypt O’ Knight, episode 35 of This Gun in My Hand, was federally reserved by Rob Northrup. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, information on how to subscribe, and to buy my books, such as Little Heist in the Big Woods and Other Revisionist Atrocities. Or buy my Godzilla doll crochet pattern. Who’s gonna pay for all this? This Gun in My Hand!

This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog.

Show Notes:
1. This episode was inspired by a Gravel Institute video titled “Why Bitcoin Is A Scam”.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0AAUrMuMPlo

2. A generation before some meddling kids and their whining dog formed Mystery Inc., Enid Blyton wrote stories about mystery solving kids and their comic relief parrot. Another of her mystery solving teams had a dog. A British author writing in the 1920s-1960s, so some parts are Problematic with a capital P.

3. A September 2021 report from the New York Times showed that mining Bitcoin now uses more energy per year than the nation of Finland. It also uses seven times more energy than Google.
https://thehill.com/changing-america/sustainability/energy/571089-new-analysis-finds-mining-bitcoin-consumes-7-times

4. When I wrote this episode, I guessed that a hamburger would cost one ten-thousandth of a Ditcoin. As of September 21, 2021, one ten-thousandth of a Bitcoin is worth $4.08 USD. Good guess!

Credits:
The opening and middle transitional music clips were from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals.

Sound title (morse code): websdr_recording_2014-07-21T07_22_13Z_7011.4kHz.wav
By klankbeeld
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/klankbeeld/sounds/243351/

Sound Effect Title: Lake shore waves.wav
By juskiddink
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/juskiddink/sounds/102808/

Sound Effect Title: Punch.wav
By ztrees1
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/ztrees1/sounds/134934/

Sound Effect Title: Punch 1
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/peridactyloptrix/sounds/209765/

Sound Effect Title: Punch in the face
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/Huminaatio/sounds/390462/

The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of a comic book panel from World Famous Heroes, No. 2 (December 1941), page 49. Pencils and inks by Ralph Mayo. Public Domain.

2 Fast 2 Boggan - Episode 34

Has this gang of young daredevils decided the most exciting sport is breaking the law? Or are they just sledding? Find out with Falk in this thrilling episode!

2 Fast 2 Boggan, episode 34 of This Gun in My Hand, was pulled across the snow and into your ears by Rob Northrup. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, information on how to subscribe, and to buy my books, such as Little Heist in the Big Woods and Other Revisionist Atrocities. Why would anyone in Hollywood greenlight D’om’s story? This Gun in My Hand!

This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog.

Show Notes:
1. Someone on the Overthinkingit podcast pointed out the plot similarities between Point Break and The Fast and The Furious.
2. That’s not what “ohana” means.

Credits:
The opening and middle transitional music clips were from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals.

Music leading up to D’om’s radio spot:
Music Title: Ich hör so gern Musik - Rudi Schuricke
Performed by Willy Berking mit seinen Solisten mit Gesang: Rudi Schuricke
License: Public Domain
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h52-fvNqqoU

Music in D’om’s radio spot:
Music Title: Weekend
Composed by Will Meisel
Performed by Eugen Grossman mit seinem Tanz-Orchester, 1938
License: Public Domain
https://youtu.be/brP3Xrj44D0 

Sound Effect Title: Car_motor_Sound.m4a
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/Blizzard123/sounds/504633/#

Sound Effect Title: 080316 Dodge truck revving in driveway.wav
By BoilingSand
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/BoilingSand/sounds/49988/

Sound Effect Title: Footsteps on gravel
By Joozz
License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
https://freesound.org/people/Joozz/sounds/531952/

Sound Effect Title: wind.wav
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/nelstayade/sounds/525292/

Sound Effect Title: Kicking/Forcing/Breaking Wooden Door
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/qubodup/sounds/160213/

Sound Effect Title: falling gumtree.wav
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/ianoboe/sounds/150203/

Sound Effect Title:Body fall_02.wav
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/Adam_N/sounds/346694/

The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of an engraving by Henry Sandham captioned “ON A TOBOGGAN HILL,” from the article “Canada as a Winter Resort” by W. George Beers, in Century Illustrated Monthly Magazine, Vol. 29 (Nov 1, 1884). Public Domain according to the Toronto Public Library’s website.

Radio Plays I Have Known

1977. First time I remember listening to a radio play, I was five or six. Sitting in the back corner of my aunt's house. I want to say it was Inner Sanctum, but it might have been Lights Out or more likely CBS Radio Mystery Theater. Some horror or thriller. The narrator described being inside the back of an ambulance. I wasn't an instant fan of radio plays, but this has stuck with me.

1988. Junior year of high school. Mr. Groesser's Creative Writing class. I think the assignment was to write a scene in some format we weren't used to, a screenplay or radio play. Julian and Jeff and I recorded a radio play making fun of Star Trek. We didn't consciously plagiarize Mad magazine, but we had read enough parodies of Star Trek that it came easy. Rapid fire jokes and puns in the style of Vaudeville or Airplane movies.

Captain Jerk: We're under attack. Boners, quick, go and shake that tv camera!

Boners: Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor not a camera man.
Captain Jerk: There are four hundred lives at stake! (Sound of baby crying.) Make that four hundred one.

We recorded it on a cassette tape and played it in class. Five or ten minutes long, probably. Mr. Groesser apologized to the class after playing it, saying he hadn't screened it ahead of time. He didn't really scold us for it though and I'm not sure which parts he felt were naughty. The captain saying "Dammit"? Spotty saying, "Bloody Hell?" A character named Boners? Oh crap, I just remembered the problematic name and accent we used for Spock. Maybe that was it.

2005. Melinda and I started dabbling in short audio skits, posted on various websites or forums. "Rainbow Brite interviews Pat Benatar." I don't remember where that idea came from but that was a good one. I recorded and posted The Radcliffe Project. "Audio commentary to second Harry Potter movie, in which the narrator (Robert Levi) describes the hidden messages planted by Chris Columbus, J.K. Rowling and Time Warner to prevent Mr. Levi from marrying the star of the film, Daniel Radcliffe."

February 28, 2006. My first podcast! Brazen Hearts, Fresh, On Sticks. "Josie is your typical young goblin, selling freshly grilled human hearts outside the mall, trying to survive her ruthless family, and pining after that dreamy hobgoblin who just stomped into town. Each week, uh, month? Year? Well, periodically she describes part of her story to you, another human whose heart she will soon be selling on a stick." Twelve chapters. How could I stop before hitting 13? I roped Melinda and some of my friends into recording parts for it. I still have tons of notes for a possible "season two."

January 7, 2007. I started the Dungeons and Dayjobs podcast, reading samples from my short story collection of the same name (still available in paperback or a free ebook on archive.org). Active through 2008, then a gap til 2012. Then in 2020, just before launching This Gun in My Hand, I posted a stand-alone story, The Liability of Keiko, about a villain calling out El Hornet Verde on all his bullcrap.

The Land Lord - Episode 33

What kind of terrorist forces struggling families out of their homes just to make more money? Is he blackmailing good cops into doing his dirty work for him? Find out!

The Land Lord, episode 33 of This Gun in My Hand, was written, voiced, edited and lorded over by Rob Northrup. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, information on how to subscribe, and to buy my books, such as Little Heist in the Big Woods and Other Revisionist Atrocities. What do I give my landlord every month? This Gun in My Hand!

This and all episodes of This Gun in My Hand are available on Youtube with automatically generated closed captions of dialog.

Show Notes:
1. This episode was inspired by On The Media podcast from August 13, 2021. Some landlords actually do remove front doors from hinges and leave the doorway open to the elements, to drive out tenants who resist evictions.
https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/otm/episodes/40-acre-promise-on-the-media

2. I couldn’t find a reliable source for prices of pistols circa 1939. If i got it wrong, it’s not the most ridiculous thing that’s ever happened in Parabellum City.

Credits:
The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals.

Sound Effect Title: Kicking/Forcing/Breaking Wooden Door
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/qubodup/sounds/160213/

Sound Effect Title: footsteps cellar.wav
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/gecop/sounds/545030/

Sound Effect Title: Footsteps Dress Shoes Wood Floor.wav
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/allrealsound/sounds/161756/

Sound Effect Title: R28-47-Man and Woman Screaming.wav
License: Public Domain
https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/482833/

The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of the cover of True Detective Mysteries, Vol. XIII, No. 3 (June 1930) by Dalton Stevens, in public domain.